I learned lately that if I am going to have quality time with my kids, that I HAVE to let the messiness go... So, I am happy to say that messiness doesn't bother me as much as it used to... I just don't have time to worry about it anymore. We pretty much just leave it during the week and on the weekends we clean up and do laundry. But, it's never as clean as it used to be :).
I don't blog often anymore for 2 reasons: 1) I don't have time, 2) I feel like I don't have much to write about :)... I live work these days (though I hope that changes soon!).
Going out of town last weekend threw me off... I didn't have time to work, and I got behind. This weekend my goal is to clean up and get ahead on school stuff so that I'm not scrambling all the time. I always feel 10 steps behind.
I love my job, though, I'm starting to see some of the downfalls... including the fact that this district has very high expectations... which is GREAT for the kids, but can be tough on the teachers. I've heard many times: "if you can teach here, you can teach anywhere." I am learning SO much and feel that it will all make me a better teacher, but I'm tired... I miss my kids... I miss my husband... I desperately want some routine so that I don't feel so scattered all the time. I'm learning that no matter how much I work, it's never enough (because there's ALWAYS something that needs to be done), so I'm trying to let some things go and just do the best that I can. At the end of the day, my family is more important.
So, my goal is to get ahead and figure out what things I will do when, and let it go the rest of the time. It's hard, though, because I'm a perfectionist; and honestly, because of the way I was hired, I always feel like I need to prove myself. I need to let that go because I know that God is ultimately in control, but it's hard to get that out of my head. I know that a lot of the pressure that I feel is what I put on myself... I'm learning to let go :). Learning is the key word :). I'll get there one day!
The first year anywhere is always hard... I have to learn the curriculum, the expectations, the procedures, etc... I'm hoping that next year will be easier since I'm writing all of these lessons :). I know that I will have to tweek things next year, but I'm hoping that I can at least start with what I have from last year and just add to it! I'm hoping that I can begin to get more creative juices flowing soon!