Disappointed but Still Trusting

I had an interview on Monday at The School of Liberal Arts and Science and LOVED it.  I was there for three hours, talked to many people (all of which I think are fabulous), and was told to go ahead and line up childcare but don't make any final plans yet.  The administration there is amazing, and the school has gone from being academically acceptable to recognized!  They are hard working and truly care about the kids that they teach/work with.  They all have a passion for what they do.  I desperately wanted to be a part of it.  I felt like I fit in 100%.  I left that interview thinking that was MY position.

This morning I called the lady that I have been developing a relationship with (we'll call her "E") to see if they were going to be making a decision soon (the lady that I wanted to watch the boys was filling up fast).  She said that they should be making a decision today and to call at 4:00 if I haven't heard anything.  Then, while I was at the pediatrician's office getting well checks for my kids, I got a phone call from someone in administration asking me some questions.  When I was on the phone with her we were getting called back, so I was a bit flustered and had to tell her I would call back later.  She told me that she got what she needed from me.  At that point she said that it was between me and one other candidate and that she wanted us both.

Well, 4:00 comes around and I still hadn't heard anything... so I called "E."  She says something to the extent of it's weird that they hadn't called you back yet, let me go see what's going on, and someone should be calling you soon.  If I don't hear anything in an hour, call her back.  She said all of this excitedly.  So, I thought it was in the bag.

About 5:05, I got a call from their admin telling me that they decided to go with someone else that has a little more experience (surprise, surprise).  She said that they wanted us both... and obviously it was one position, so they chose by going with the person that had more experience.  But she did follow that up with saying that they are most likely going to have a few more openings and if so, then they WILL be offering me a job.  They will call me by this Friday.

So, I'm disappointed because I wanted THAT position... But, all I can do is trust.  God has the right position for me.  And if not, then I guess I'm not meant to work right now.

I called the lady that will be watching the boys this evening, and she told me about a wonderful charter school that is just down the street from her (in Carrollton, where we would like to live!), and she knows someone that works there.  They are supposedly hiring a lot of teachers right now because it's growing so fast.  So, I'm going to go ahead and apply there... but honestly, I really want to work with "poor" kids... and I really doubt that these kids are poor kids...

So, again, all I can do is leave all of this is God's hands... He is ultimately in control and He knows what's best.  I have to make the choice to trust Him and give it to Him.

Here I am again, laying MY plans down.  I really have no control even though I would like to think I do at times :).