Organization Tools: Do they just make things more difficult?

I am in the process of trying to work through some things and figure out ways to stop stressing about everything. Robert and I were talking last night, and he really gave me some insight into things that he sees from his point of view. I made some decisions that I think are really going to help me. I am going to attempt to make these changes, but it will be hard because certain things are engrained into me (not sure why).

Household notebooks, organizers, routines, schedules, etc are good things, but they aren't good if they make things more difficult. Routines/schedules just DON'T work for our family (I knew I would come to this conclusion again after I made the last routine, but I had to try one more time). Robert never has a normal schedule. We never know from one day to the next if he has to work dinner in the dining hall, what days he's going to have off, what time he's going to be home, what time he has to go to work, etc. It's always been this way, and always will be in camp ministry. Their schedule is completely based around who is scheduled to use the camp each day. I think some routines are necessary, but they just happen (bed time especially). Having a written routine/schedule just makes me feel defeated all the time. This also goes into scheduling where/when I go to town and go grocery shopping. Right now, we just go when we get paid for our main two week grocery shop (no matter what day of the week it is), then we just get things here and there as we need them. My goal is always to try to fit grocery shopping into one certain day every two weeks, and that's it. For some people, that works. With our schedule, it doesn't. I need to just be okay with that and move on! :)

There are certain things that I have to plan because it does help. Budgeting (obviously), meal planning (helps us save money and time), shopping list, and a simple to do list. That's all I need. I have my calendar on my computer, and that's all I need for a calendar.

My desire to "homeschool preschool" is another thing that makes me feel like a failure a lot of times because I don't have the time or desire to write the lessons (since I have to write lessons for school). Robert reminded me that I'm not a failure just because I don't do "homeschool preschool." All I need to do is read to her daily and take advantage of teachable moments. She is a smart kid, and that's without doing "homeschool preschool" on a regular basis.

My desire to do things a certain way has turned into an idol, and I want to just rid myself of it. It is causing bondage, and I'm tired of it.